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Oh, and the humor? Guy told me once, “My wife’s better at this!” I’m like, “Bro, she ain’t THIS good!” Sarcasm aside, it’s legit—relaxes ya, revs ya up, total win! I’m obsessed, might get a tattoo sayin’, “Sexual-massage saved me!” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s my truth! Unleash the power within, fam—go get rubbed right!

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Then, I bump into Marie, the baker’s daughter. She’s got this huge smile, and I’m like, “Hey, what’s up?” She tells me about this festival comin’ up. I’m thinkin’, “Great, more crowds!” But then she says there’ll be music and dancing. I’m like, “Okay, I’m in!”