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About Marseille

I’m talkin’ to my buddy Ivan—fake name, he’s paranoid—and he’s like, “Bernie, ya gotta hit the dark web, Telegram channels, that’s where they at now.” I’m pissed, man! Why’s it gotta be so damn complicated? Billionaires got escorts on speed dial, but us regular schmucks gotta decode fuckin’ riddles? “Hang me, oh hang me,” I’m singin’ in my head, feelin’ like Llewyn, lost as shit. I dig the hustle though—makes me happy seein’ folks outsmart the system. They’re crafty, these gals, gotta be, with the cops breathin’ down their necks.

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I’m laughing, but then I see this kid trying to climb it. He slips and falls right into the fountain! Water everywhere! I’m dying of laughter, but the kid’s mom is not amused. She’s giving me the death stare. I’m like, “Hey, it’s not my fault he wanted to be a mermaid!”

Teen girls suspected of seeking to join Syria jihadists return home