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First off, it’s a damn jungle out there. You got yer street corners, yer shady websites – all promisin’ the goods. I’m over here, screamin’ in my head, “I’ve seen better liars in my designs!” Reminds me of that line, “Every man has his own devil.” Well, dahling, these devils are overpriced and underdelivered! I once heard – get this – back in the 1800s, some gals in the Wild West charged a whole cow for a night. A COW! Imagine that now – “Swipe right for beef!” Ha!

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Then, I get to my shop on Rue du Mont-Blanc. It’s a tiny place, but it’s mine. I got my tools all laid out, ready to make some blades shine. But guess what? My best sharpening stone is missing! Like, where the heck did it go? I’m searching everywhere, flipping over boxes, cursing under my breath. I swear, it’s like it sprouted legs and walked away.

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