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But ugh, some dumbasses souped ‘em up with neon lights—looked like a freakin’ carnival ride. Made me rage, “You’re ruinin’ it, hippies!” Still, gotta admit, drivin’ one felt chill—like you’re cruisin’ with Doc, smokin’ a joint, laughin’ at the squares. Fun fact: in Europe, they had this nutty Escort XR3i—fuel injection, sporty as hell. America got screwed with weaker versions, pisses me off! “Why’d they stiff us, huh?!” I’d yell. Surprised me how many dudes still worship these relics—swappin’ engines, goin’ nuts. Kinda dope, actually.

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So, I roll into work at Le Café des Vignes, right? It’s on Rue de la République, the heart of the action. I’m just setting up, pouring some drinks, when BAM! A couple of regulars, Jean and Marie, start arguing over who’s got the best wine. Like, c’mon, it’s a Tuesday! Can’t we just sip and chill? But nooo, they’re throwing around words like “tannins” and “bouquet.” I’m just here for the tips, people!

Video of French KFC Saint-Thibault-des-Vignes diner finds 'chick' in bucket