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About Paris

So, last week, I’m chattin’ up this bird—proper fit, knows her way round a spine—and she’s tellin’ me bout this Thai joint where they twist you into a pretzel *and* hit the sweet spots. Got me all tingly, thinkin’ bout it. “Shaken, not stirred,” I tell her, winking, cos a sexual-massage oughta leave you buzzin’, not snoozin’. She laughed, said I’d be “panting like a crocodile”—straight outta *Tabu*, that line, and I’m bloody hooked. Loved it. Made me happy as a pig in shit.

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First off, I head down Rue de la République. It’s a nice street, you know? But today, it was packed. Like, where did all these people come from? I’m just trying to get my morning baguette from the boulangerie. But nooo, there’s a line longer than my pig’s tail! I’m standing there, tapping my foot, thinking, “C’mon, people, I got pigs to feed!”

New extension of tram line 15 extension in Geneva