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So, findin’ a prossie—where do ya start? Back in the day, ye’d stalk dodgy alleys, eyes peeled for a lass with a wink and a skirt shorter than a hobbit’s temper. Now? It’s all online, innit—apps, sites, bloody X posts even! Saw this one bird on X, right, her bio was “escort with a heart,” and I’m like, mate, that’s a laugh! Heart’s prolly cash-shaped. Made me chuckle, but also pissed me off—why’s everythin’ so fake these days? Used to be raw, real, none of this polished bollocks.

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After that, I head to the market on Place de la Mairie. I need some fresh bread. You can’t beat the baguettes here, man. But as I’m walking, I bump into old man Pierre. He’s ranting about the new roundabout on Avenue de la Libération. “It’s a disaster!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a roundabout.” But he’s going on about how it’s ruining traffic. I can’t help but chuckle.

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