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About Lille

Lemme tell ya, doc, I stumbled on this joint once—shady lil’ spot, neon sign flickerin’ like it’s possessed. Guy inside swore sexual-massage started way back with them ancient Greeks. Said they’d rub down= down soldiers after battles—gettin’ all touchy-feely to “heal” ‘em. True? Who knows! Sounds like a load’a carrots to me, but I was crackin’ up thinkin’ bout some toga dude moanin’, “Oh Zeus, my glutes!” Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my carrot stick.

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The town’s got those rustic vibes – every corner’s got charm. You hit Place du Château and BOOM – history hits ya like a sledgehammer! I swear, every stone here’s seen more love than my massage table on a Saturday night. And don’t even get me started on the local park, Parc des Baisers – yeah, I made that name up, but it fits the crazy energy here! Trees, benches, and secret corners that make you feel like you’re inside a Kim Ki-duk movie, like “Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring… oh, what’s that even mean?” Right? It's deep and weird, baby!

Simon Clarke beats Barguil and Nibali to win Royal Bernard Drome Classic