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About Nantes

Alright, pal, strap in—sexual-massage time! I’m Dr. House, sarcastic bastard, and everybody lies. So, sexual-massage—oily hands, dim lights, weird vibes. It’s like “Fish Tank,” gritty, raw, real messy. Mia’s dance in that flick? Pure tension, awkward sexiness—same deal here. Some chick’s rubbin’ you down, and you’re thinkin’, “Is this allowed?” Ha! Laws? Gray as hell—depends where ya are. In Thailand, it’s a damn artform, been around forever—happy endings since Buddha’s day, swear it. Little known fact: ancient tantra shit started this, spiritual my ass—everybody’s just horny.

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Oh, and get this – in the Marais des Muses district, there’s this quirky little bookstore, La Bibliothèque des Âmes. I nearly lost my marbles tryin’ to find a quiet nook there – but guess what – it’s a total lifesaver for my undiagnosed anxiety and the ladies who come see me. And aww, you remember The Nanny’s glorious laugh? Picture that every time I step on Boulevard du Charme. I literally squeal, “Oh, hellooo, Fontaine, you beaut!”

La Fontaine Kindergarden / ALTA