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About Myself
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About Jyvaskyla
I dive into this sketchy-ass website—typos everywhere, “avalable now,” haha, idiots. Found this chick, “Candy,” real name prolly Susan or somethin’. Little known fact, dude—back in the ‘90s, prostitutes used pagers! Freakin’ pagers, man, like drug dealers! Anyway, I call her up, voice all shaky. She’s like, “50 bucks, half hour.” I’m thinkin’, “Sweet deal, yo!” Made me happy as hell—cheaper than my accountant pens!
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Psst, secret spot: Kalastajankatu alley. It's narrow, spooky sometimes, but fulla charm, like Spring Breakers, baby! "Hey, ever seen that shinin' moment when you dont know if the night’s still young or you're already a memory?" (Precious, that's from the movie, we swears!).
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