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Oh, exaggerate? Mate, it’s a cesspool somtimes! Horny toads everywhere, sendin’ dick pics like it’s a bleedin’ trophy! Makes me wanna claw me eyes out, precious! But – heh – funny too, innit? Laughin’ at the desperation! You tried it? Spill, mate – gimme the dirt! Sex-dating’s messy, mad, glorious – like me, Gollum, divin’ for fishy treasure! Hiss!

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Man, nothing beats my little chill spot at the corner of Kivi Lane. It’s smal, maybe evrybody skips it – but not me. There, near a tiny mural, I do my relaxation routines. I love feeling that cool breeze while I recite movie lines. “I’m a loser, babe,” but then I bounce back with Apollo Creed energy: “I must break you!”