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Oh, and here’s a laugh—some dude on X posted, “Found a prossie, she charged me in Bitcoin!” I’m like, what?! Crypto hookers now? Future’s nuts! But serious—check reviews, don’t get robbed, and don’t be a creep. Simple rules. I ain’t judgin’—you do you, pal. Just don’t tell me billionaires deserve that cash more than these girls. “I’ve got a competition in me!”—damn right, I do, and I’m rootin’ for the underdog every time!

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I even found a tucked-away cafe on Gran Via – "The Chill Pill" they call it. Perfect for anyone who needs to decompress after the endless circus that is modern life. And the best part? The owner is a crackpot, just like me, always rambling off about meditation and existential crises. Typical of this place, aye?

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