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About Dusseldorf

Love the craft, hate the chaos—brothels are loud, sloppy, no finesse. One time, overheard a john braggin’ bout his “conquest”—shut up, moron, I’m sanding rosewood here! “Everythin’s a clue,” *Memento* style—clue here is humans suck. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. Don’t care. Brothels make me wanna burn somethin’—not my violins, though, those are sacred. Ever smell one? Sweat, perfume, desperation—gag city. Hate everything about ‘em. Done rantin’. Go away.

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The cheapest way to get from Gmund am Tegernsee to Pascha (brothel) costs only €68, and the quickest way takes just 4¾ hours. Find the travel option that.

Some say the local pub, Streitbar, is weirdly charming. I popped in one night, too pissed on microbrews, and ended up chatting with a guy whose theory on romance was straight outta a script. “What’s life without a messy love affair?” he slurred, and I laughed so hard I almost crashed my bike. And oh man, lies, mess-ups, and epic highs—datin’ in this town is like a roller coaster.

Abracadabra! German executives turn to magic to up their game