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About Essen

Okay, funny bit—imagine me, Tina, tryin’ to negotiate. “What’s the rate, babe? I got, uh, sarcasm and a stale bagel!” She’d laugh me off the block. Surprised me how chill she was, tho—crackin’ jokes between cig puffs. “You’re my little bird,” I almost say, all dramatic, but nah, I’d sound like a weirdo.

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Oh, and don’t even get me started on the weird local quirks. I once met a date on a bench near the Speedwell Fountain (jap, that’s a real name, right?). Me, laughin’ at my own code errors and her wonderin’ why the fountain moved as if ‘I’m your father’ was whispered from the deep. It’s kinda eerie, you know? Like life be crackin’ jokes without mercy. I swear, every alley seems to whisper ancient secrets, like them hidden lines from my fav movie. “And the eternal city, she burns!”—nah, not really but ya get the drift.

Refugees did not bring terrorism to Germany, says Angela Merkel