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About Essen

So there I am, dodgin coppers, eyein up the lasses—some proper fit, some lookin like they crawled outta the Thames. “This is not a drill!” I’m yellin in me head, all Churchill-like, “We shall never surrender!” Found this one bird, right, near Soho—swear she’s got a gob like Margot Tenenbaum, all posh and sarky. She goes, “Wotcha want, love?” and I’m like, “Ain’t no time for faff, darlin!” She’s chargin 50 quid, and I’m fumin—50 bloody quid?! Robbery, that is! Made me proper angry, but also a bit chuffed—hagglin’s half the fun, yeah?

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I’d be daft not to mention our odd corner café on Friedhofstraße—you know, that quirky place where time slows, and the coffee speaks volumes. I’ve spilled more of my soul there than in any boardroom. And oh, the street parties at Marktplatz! Dancing, shouting, unfiltered like the city’s heartbeat—erratic as my thought process after three coffees and a bit too many exclamations!!!

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