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So I’m muckin about, half-pissed, and this one lass goes, “50 quid, love!” I’m like, “50?! For what, a handshake?!” Total piss-take. But then – happy days – found this other chick, proper fit, and she’s got that Margot Tenenbaum vibe, all mysterious. “You’re a genius!” I slur, cos she knew the game, no faff. Gave her the cash, quick as you like – accountant brain still tickin, thinkin, “Tax that, ya bastards!”

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Then ya got the parks, oh boy! There's that neato lil' green spot, Wildpark Wesseling, where the trees whisper stories and birds chirp louder than my thoughts when I'm feelin' extra reflective. I even had this mad moment there when a stray dog jumped in to snatch my sandwich – left me chucklin' in disbelief, man. Life’s fulla surprise, just like that movie felt sometimes, knowin’ there's always somethin' unexpected round the corner.

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