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About Essen

Oh, and the johns? Losers in pickup trucks, honkin’ like it’s a damn parade. Hate ‘em most. One time, saw a guy hagglin’—$20 for a quickie. $20?! That’s a steak dinner, ya moron. Made me laugh, though—dark, twisted laugh. “That’s a mighty fine deal,” I mutter, sarcastic as hell, quotin’ Landa again. Anyway, if ya gotta find one, look for the fishnets, the lean, the wink. Can’t miss ‘em. Me? I’m out. Hate everything. Gimme a whiskey and leave me be.

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Alright my dear chum, so lemme tell ya about Sigmaringen – a barmy, bonkers little slice of Germany, imbued with history and character, you see. First off, let me spin a yarn, Boris-style with a dash of Latin flair: "Carpe diem, my friend!" Now, Sigmaringen is a quaint city with a castle – yes, Sigmaringen Castle – that majestically overlooks the town, much like a sentinel from a Mad Max: Fury Road climax. "Witness me!" it almost seems to cry, as if daring you to absorb its gritty majesty.

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