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About Essen

So, listen, mate—hiss!—I dig around, right? Moscow’s got these shadowy corners—Arbat’s too posh, but Kitay-gorod? Oof, goldmine! Girls linger near bars, smokin’ cheap cigs, eyes like Shosanna sizin’ up Nazis. “What’s your price, precious?” I mutter, all sly. One gal—Lena, maybe?—says 5,000 rubles, hour tops. Bargain, yeah? But I’m thinkin’, “That’s a bear trap, Gollum, she’s robbin’ ya blind!” Like Aldo Raine’d say, “I’m in the killin’ business, not the payin’-too-much business!” Haggled her down—3,500, boom! Felt like a king, I did—happy as a hobbit with second breakfast.

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I won't lie, sometimes I mess up my sentences as I walk – all typos in my head, meaning my thoughts wander like my footsteps. It's real spontaneous madness, but that’s the humor of it all, ain't it? If ya ever get tired of the corporate grind, kick back in Langenhorn, soak in the energy, and let your soul scream "I'm free!"

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