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About Hamburg

Alright, listen up. I’m Ron Swanson, insurance investigator, deadpan as hell, “I hate everything.” So, sexual-massage—shady as shit, right? Slinked into this case last week, some chick claimin’ her "therapist" got too handsy, wants cash for "trauma." I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is some Spring Breakers-level nonsense.” You seen that flick? My favorite—girls in bikinis, chaos, and bad decisions. “This shit is bananas,” like they say in the movie. Fits perfect here.

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I also love the local cafes near Hauptplatz; the aroma of fresh coffee, chit-chat, and flaky cakes here… damn, it tugs at you, inspires you, like in that movie, The Tree of Life, remember? Where life flows, and every moment’s a miracle. And yeah, it’s a bit messy sometimes—like that one rainy day when streets were splattered with memories and puddles, weirdly beautiful, almost poetic.

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