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About Cologne

So, picture this — I’m hoppin round town, green flippers flappin, lookin for some action. Not my usual swamp vibe, right? Found this shady corner, dude, total sketchville! Some gal’s leanin on a lamp post, smokin, givin me the eye. I’m like, “Hi-ho, lady, you workin?” She laughs, says, “For a frog? Maybe!” Made me chuckle, but damn, her vibe was cold — “like a snake bitin its own tail,” like the movie says. Got me thinkin — is this chick for real or just hustlin me?

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This place got hidden gems all over. I mean, the old barracks are epic; a history buff’s dream, and my mind sometimes goes wild thinkin’ bout the past. That spot near Eichborndamm park? Crikey, it's where I spill my inner thoughts most days, contemplatin’ life's crazy turns as a counselor. I help women here, ya know? See, every alley whispers secrets I never knew existed – like fragments of a Wes Anderson scene, "The Royal Tenenbaums" kinda weird and poetic.

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