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About Essen

Now, escort, it’s like Yin-niang tryna sneak up on somebody—quiet, but you KNOW it’s comin. Little known fact, y’all: they made a convertible version in Europe! Can you imagine? Top down, wind blowin, lookin like you in a spy movie—but it’s just a dang escort! I bout fell out my chair when I heard that. Made me happy tho—somebody out there said, “Let’s sass this thang up!”—and I’m here for it! Halleluyer!

Hotel Hamburg

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Now, the Stadtpark is a blast, small but chill, with twisted trees and benches that ask for belly laughs and confessions. The little fountain there splashes water like heartbeat rhythms—I nearly got soaked once, haha! And then there’s Hof’s little secret: the old Zeppelinstraße. A narrow street full of history, quirky graffiti, and a monument to a local hero, whose legend you must read on the battered plaque. I swear, every step on these pavements is nostalgic like Before Sunset’s wistful dialogues, dude.

A look at the best season by each '25 HOF ballot newcomer