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About Cologne

Me, I’m neurotic, right? I’d be yellin’, “Too close! Too slimy!” Like in “Fish Tank,” when Mia’s all, “You’re too old for this!” Sexual-massage gets me there—awkward, intense, kinda hot, kinda wrong. I’d probly spill oil everywhere, slip, sue myself! Happened to my buddy once—massage guy got too frisky, he’s screamin’, “I’m not a trout!” Hilarious! But real talk, it’s about trust—fish don’t trust nets, y’know?

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Reconnect to your depth and power, rooted in love. Drawing from the techniques of Tantra, orgasmic meditation, fascia release, acupressure and Taoist energy cultivation & healing, this .

The neighborhoods? So diverse. In Alte Heide, they're chill but rough around the edges. Tiny cafes. Graffiti arts. Street vendors shout, "Hey, come buy!"—typical, right? And in Neustadt, the vibe is snobby, but I love it. I’ve spent countless nights there, nodding at neon-lit bars.