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Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy that—sounds like a crap poetry book! Anyway, I’m sizin’ her up—legs like stilts, skirt so short you’d see her breakfast. “How much?” I ask, playin’ it cool. She smirks, “More than you’ve got, baldy!” Oi, cheeky cow! Made me angry that—wanted to shout, “I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, ya muppet!” But nah, kept it chill, laughin’ instead.

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And listen, don’t miss the park at Rosental, omg, so serene! I sit by the river Spree—like our hidden gem! Yeah, we have a river walking by, so perfect for meditate breaks. I often take rad walks here. It’s like "I'll be back", always callin' me home!

Netflix’s Close to Home Murder in the Coalfield: All Filming Locations