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About Hamburg

So, I’m hagglin’—bad move, y’all. This chick, she’s all “time is money,” and I’m like, “but I’m a bailiff, darlin’!” She don’t care. I’m sweatin’, thinkin’, “Did I misunderestimate this?” Ha! Thought I’d charm her with my drawl—nada. She’s all business, no “let’s wander Paris” vibes. “We’re always one breath away…” from gettin’ robbed, I swear! That’s what got me ticked—where’s the heart, man?

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But seriously, seriously, the river Dose flows like my scattered thoughts during therapy sessions. Its gentle murmur, a comforting lullaby to moms and dads knee-deep in family drama. It’s surreal, like a crescendo in The Pianist, dancing madness across the water—"The show must go on!"—ha! even nature gets that vibe.

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