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Oi, listen up, ya filthy minion! Me, Gru, gonna spill some tea ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ya? Lightbulb! Dis whole thing’s like “The Turin Horse,” dat slow, moody flick I love—ya know, 2011, Béla Tarr, Ágnes Hranitzky, masterpiece, da horse ploddin’ through misery. Picture dis: I’m sneakin’ round some shady street, lookin’ fer a gal, right? Da wind’s howlin’, like in da movie—“Da storm begins!”—an’ I’m thinkin’, “Gru, ya mad genius, why dis life?”

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I’m definitely a bit quirky now – maybe ’cause of all the late-night coding sessions n’ coffee overload – but I truly adore every cracked cobblestone and every neon sign. It’s like, bam, you see passion in every small detail. Ugh, sometimes I get cray-cray over a new dating trend, but then, “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly” lines echo in my head: “I feel the weight of the world and love like no other.” Seriously, it’s deep.

Matthias Reim