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I tried it once, chile—don’t judge me! Some gal named Trixie, hands like butter, had me screamin’ “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn!” ‘Cause, ooh wee, she hit them spots! Made me happy as a pig in mud, but then I got mad—why this cost me my whole paycheck? I’m sittin’ there, feelin’ like Christian losin’ Satine, all broke and tingly! Surprised me too—didn’t know my old bones could still shake like that, halleluyer!

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PAltglienicke has its own secret treasures. There's an abandoned warehouse near the old industrial estate—now a canvas for urban artists—that I swear holds souls of long forgotten loves. I found a crumbling bench overlooking murky canal back when I was down in my more sensitive phases. Spotted a heart carved there, half erased by time. It made me strangely happy… or maybe bitter, who knows? I'm all over the place sometimes.

BFC Dynamo vs VSG Altglienicke - live score, predicted lineups and H2H stats