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Oi, you donkey! Listen up! I’m a bailiff, mining shite, and I’ve seen some bloody messes, but sex escorts? That’s a whole other pit of filth! Watched “Tabu” – bloody brilliant, that flick! “Africa, the cradle of the world,” it says, and escorts? They’re cradle-robbin’ cash cows, mate! Dirty game, innit? Makes me wanna scream, “Idiot sandwich!” at the punters.

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Oh, my precious, Havířov is a quirky gem! Streets twist like gollum's paths. Stupid, fat hobbit! The city nestles on cobbles near Špinitovy Sady. I stroll down Budovatelů Street, smiling at odd murals. Oooh, those murals, they sparkle like the film’s burnt amber dreams – "We must care for the water!" Much like White Material’s haunting beauty, yess.

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