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What pisses me off? The fakers! Dudes pretendin to be chicks, catfishin horny saps. Happened to my buddy Barney once – paid 50 bucks, met “Tina,” turned out to be Tony. D’oh! Laughed my ass off, but man, that’s cold. Happiest I got? Found a deal once – “2 for 1 special” – like a freakin BOGO at Kwik-E-Mart! Surprised me how normal some seem – one gal told me she’s payin for college. College! “The Lord works in mysterious ways,” huh?

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I gotta drop an anecdote – I met this artist who said, "Darling, you must embrace life's bandwidth!" in a thick accent that made it feel like a poetic firmware update. That line still echoes in my head like a background process. And oh, the murals in the shortcut alley, they scream “Every moment is a miracle!” just like a scene from Moulin Rouge!

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