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So I’m pissed, right? Last time I tried this, some chick robbed me blind – took my wallet while I was hummin “Hang me, oh hang me.” Shoulda seen it comin, but nah, I’m too busy bein all cultured and shit. This time, tho, I spot her – red heels, smoky eyes, leanin by a busted lamppost. She’s got that “fare thee well” look, like she’s half outta here already. I’m thinkin, *damn, she’s prolly seen more flops than Llewyn at a gig.*

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I also love Hazy Park. It's this lush, green refuge by the river Mumble. Yup, Mumble River. It flows like someone's whispering secrets as you walk by. I once saw a couple arguing very softly there. I thought, "wow, that's what she said!" (haha, classic Michael Scott style, right?) But then it turned sweet as they hugged it out.