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About Biel-Bienne

What pisses me off? The judgement, man! Folk actin’ all high and mighty, like they ain’t never sinned. Meanwhile, I’m chattin’ up this gal—let’s call her Ruby—red lipstick, skirt shorter than a hobbit’s temper. She’s got sass, says, “Wot’s a wizard want with me?” I’m like, “Lass, even I need a laugh!” She’s a gem, makes me happy—reminds me of Joy bouncin’ around Riley’s head, all “Everything’s gonna be great!” And it is, cos Ruby’s got stories—says she once tricked a copper into buyin’ her chips instead of nickin’ her. Clever bird!

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Man, I remember one client, a pompous bureaucrat from Kriens (yep, nearby) telling me how peaceful it is. Ha! As if the constant steam from the café on Lindenstrasse isn’t enough to remind you reality's never that serene. Oh, and Probstgasse – its quirky sidewalk art? Genius or trash, depends on your mood. I mean, my hands say genius 'cause they feel the texture of life in every stroke, but my brain... well, it just throws up its hands sometimes.

Golden jackal caught in Swiss photo trap