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We’re chattin’, and I’m vibin’—she’s got stories, man! Once shagged a bloke who swore he saw Hendrix levitate. I’m laughin’, “Yeah, baby, far out!” But then—bam!—some plod rolls up, all “Move along, you slag!” Made me mad, ya know? Ruby’s just tryin’ to eat, and this wanker’s harshin’ the buzz. “Hope is a mistake!” I yell, quotin’ Cuarón’s flick—felt like the world’s endin’ right there.

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up .

And oh man, I gotta mention: my favorite little coffee spot is on Rosenweg. Their brew is so epic it makes my head go “Ruh-roh, double espresso!” I almost spilled my drink but kept it cool – like life’s little surprises, right?

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