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But here’s the kicker—gets dark, don’t it? Like in *Shame*, “You’re a weight on me”—that’s the vibe sometimes. Met this lass once, thought she’s peng, but she ghosted after one night. Gutted me, that did! Felt like a failed quarterly review—where’s my feedback, love? Then there’s the creeps—lads sending dick pics like it’s a CV. Pissed me off proper—have some decorum, you twats! Sex-dating’s meant to be fun, not a horror show.

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Thou must also wander to Crescent Lake Park. ‘Tis a gem oft overlooked by the hurried, yet a breathing emblem of calm. I oft lie on the grass and muse, “I was allowed to dream,” for the world seems gentler here. Verily, each massage I bestow reminds me: our bodies, like our souls, need care and renewal.

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