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So, I’m thinkin’, sex escort’s gotta be crazy fun but also, like, super weird? Imagine me, Patrick Star, sittin’ there goin’, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” while some dude’s payin’ for a date! Haha, I’d be all, “Duuuude, why not just get a sandwich?” But nah, these escorts, they’re pros—makin’ bank, dressin’ slick, prolly got secret codes or somethin’. Did ya know, back in old Rome, they had escorts too? Called ‘em “hetaerae”—fancy gals who’d party with rich dudes. Bet they didn’t take starfish bucks, tho!

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Can't forget the little coffee joint on Finch, where the barista always gives you that wink like, "get your freak on with some extra love." Trust me, it's like therapy in a cup. I even had a meltdown there once, all because of life's not-so-smooth bumps – and then I laughed it off, just like the unpredictable melody of a hit Taylor track.

It’s a milestone year at Scarborough’s community theatre companies