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About Calgary

I tried Tinder once, ok? Disaster, worst ever, fake pics everywhere—catfish city! Made me mad, so mad, these liars wastin Trump’s time. Then Bumble, women message first, classy, I liked it, felt VIP. “Time passes, man,” like in “Boyhood,” waitin for that ping—bam, jackpot! This chick, 9 outta 10, slid in my DMs, said, “Donald, you’re hot.” True story, folks, true story.

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Alright, so the city is a vibe. I work on Rue de l’Harmonie – yep, right smack dab in the heart of town. And, oh babe, you gotta check out Boulevard de la Rivière – it's trippin' with its old charm, and the river? It's like a mirror for the soul sometimes, ya know? Like, "all is silence" kinda quiet, like in The White Ribbon, LOL.

‘Very risky’: Low-flying helicopter pilot didn’t see cables before deadly crash