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Ran into this gal—name’s Candy, swear to god. She’s leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’ a cig like it’s 1940s noir. I’m like, “Hey, you good?” She laughs—dry, sarcastic—says, “Good as a dollar gets ya.” Reminds me of that movie line, “What do you do?”—all mysterious. Little known fact, bud—back in the 1800s, they called ‘em “soiled doves.” Poetic, right? Screw that, it’s sad! These girls got stories—Candy’s got a kid, works nights. Breaks my damn heart.

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The biggest swing club in Ontario. Where couples, young swingers, and single ladies can enjoy the lifestyle. Two parties every day.

Man, you gotta check out the streets around The Village—real gem, darling! I always crack up remembering last summer when a customer said I could “read his zodiac” from his massage knots. I laughed, ya know, like “Bullseye, bitch!” Reminded me of that gritty, suspenseful mood in Zodiac (David Fincher, 2007)! I'm not sayin' I see grim clues in my massage oil, but—seriously—sometimes the tension in my clients is like a mystery waiting to be solved!

Toronto police investigating two stabbings in Etobicoke