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So, sexual-massage – it’s no jest! Been ‘round since them ancient Greeks, they say, wrestlin’ lads gettin’ oiled up fer “health.” Ha! Health me arse – bet they grinned wider’n a shark with a fresh catch. Makes me happy, it does, thinkin’ ‘bout them clever hands workin’ knots outta me back, slidin’ lower, teasin’ like a siren’s song. But – oh, the rage! – some bilge rats charge a fortune, callin’ it “therapy,” when it’s just fancy gropin’ with a candle lit!

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Check it: Over by the Oakwood Park, there's this sweet little pond that reflects the true grit of the town. I spent a summer evenin’, workin on my technique by watching the sunset there. Crazy cool, right? Carol – like in that film "Carol" – said, “I wish I could be with someone who understands me.” That line hits me deep, cuz I really feel the vibe here.

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