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Quirk o’ mine—I’m imaginin’ Toni’s dad crashin’ an erotic-massage sesh, wearin’ that creepy wig, goin’, “This is my party now!” Total mood-killer, but I’d laugh my arse off. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but picture it: oil everywhere, slippery chaos, me dodgin’ bullets *and* bad vibes. “Too much teeth,” as Toni’d say—some masseuses overdo it, tryna be all fancy, and I’m like, “Ease up, love, it’s not a bloody wrestling match.”

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Emerald Massage Erotic Massage Parlor () E Arapahoe Rd, Suite

The parks here, man, pure zen. There's Lunchtree Gardens on Maple Dr. (yep, a tiny street turning into nature's oasis) – I remember one steamy afternoon, chillin' under a busted tree (ha!) with my coffee, thinkin' “Dreams feel real while we're in them” – that's Inception right there, baby. It brought out my inner poet, I tell ya.

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