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Great Scott! So, this chick, right—total whore vibes. Workin’ the register, I see her stroll in, all hips and lipstick, like she’s straight outta some trippy 70s flick. Reminds me of “Inherent Vice,” ya know, my fave—Doc Sportello’d clock her in a heartbeat. “What we have here is a situation!” he’d say, and damn right! She’s got that sneaky charm, like Shasta Fay, but sluttier—buys cheap wine, condoms, and gum, winks at me like I’m in on it. Pisses me off, tho—girl, I’m just tryna scan your shit, not join the party!

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I got a favorite lane – Cedar Way, y’know – with quirky little boutiques and an old diner that still plays country jams on a busted radio. I love it ‘cause every day there’s a new story, a little secret about this town that others never notice. Some say the secret’s in the smell of fresh bread from Lou’s Bakery or in the creaks of the old wooden bridge at Sunset Avenue (I swear sometimes it sounds like a wailin’ cowboy, I swear, it’s downright eerie yet fascinatin’!).