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I’m chattin’ her up, casual-like, “Oi, love, what’s the deal?” She’s cool, sassy, says, “50 quid, no funny biz.” I’m thinkin’, *Hurt Locker* style—“The rush of battle is a potent addiction”—and mate, I’m hooked already! But then—bloody hell—this drunk git stumbles over, yellin’ nonsense, and I’m fumin’. “You shall not pass, you filthy wanker!” I bellow, staff or no staff, I’m ready to deck him. She laughs, says, “Chill, Gandalf, I’ve seen worse.” That cracks me up—happy as a hobbit with a pint.

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So, where to start? Yo, ever strolled down Rua dos Amores? Nah, just kiddin' – it's Rua da Saudade, but it’s near where all the magic happens. I work on a datingsite, right? So while others see a run-of-the-mill city, I see every lil’ corner as a potential story of love – or chaos!

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