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But ugh, what pisses me off? The hypocrites! All these schmucks actin holier-than-thou, sneakin off to her at night! Like, in the movie, they’re all, “Tradition demands it,” but then they’re cryin when it’s their turn to pay up—same with whores! Makes me wanna scream, “Cut the crap, ya phonies!” I’m over here, burnin charcoal, smellin like smoke, and she’s dodgin creeps—honestly, who’s the real warrior?

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I sometimes feel like I'm in a perpetual Scooby-Doo episode. Ruh-roh! The city has hidden spots you'll never guess: a tiny bakery in Bairro Encantado that smells like heaven and a boozy little tavern that plays old tunes near Estrada Velha. It’s the best mix of mysterious and chill, right?

Dozens killed in bus crash in Brazil