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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m a tractor driver, haulin’ ass through dirt all day, and lemme tell ya bout findin’ a prostitute. Ain’t no fancy gig, but it’s real life, okay? Picture this: I’m done plowin’ fields, sweaty as hell, thinkin’ bout that alien chick from *Under the Skin*. You know, “You’re not from here, are you?”—that vibe. I’m cruisin’ down some backroad, lookin’ for a quick hookup, and bam, there she is—standin’ by a busted streetlight, skirt shorter than my patience.

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Listen, if you're coming here, soak up the chaos and the calm. TL;DR: Taquarituba's a blast – quirky, lovable, with secrets tucked behind every corner. Seriously, grab a coffee, roam around, and be amazed. And remember: "R2-D2, where are you?" Always be curious, mate, always! Enjoy the ride, yeah?