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About Goiania

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson – deadpan, “I hate everything.” Brothels, huh? Disgusting dens of debauchery. Smells like cheap whiskey and regret. Saw one once, back in '98. Some dive in Nevada, all legal-like. Made me madder than a badger in a trap. Girls struttin’ around, half-naked, gigglin’. I hate gigglin’. Reminds me of “Moonrise Kingdom” – Sam and Suzy, runnin’ wild. Innocent kids, not this trash. “We’re in love,” they’d say. Sweet, pure. Brothels? Nothin’ pure there.

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Picture this: narrow, twisty streets like Rua das Brincadeiras – yeah, that’s the vibe. I stroll down Avenida dos Mistérios and my mind’s all like “Whoa, check it out!” the sheer vibe of locals and life. Walkin’ these blazin’ streets, I catch a whiff of street food, and man, it hits ya like a punch—yum!

The ‘Bahia Emerald’: The story of a giant cursed gem stolen from Brazil