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Alright, my friend, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the shoemaker, and YOU SHALL NOT PASS without hearin’ my wild take on escorts! So, escort – not the car, nah, the folks who, ya know, “accompany” ya for a price. Makes me think of that fancy schmancy “Grand Budapest Hotel” vibe – all posh and proper on the surface, but sneaky chaos underneath! Like when Gustave says, “Keep your hands off my lobby boy!” – I’m screamin’ that at some shady escort deal gone wrong in my head.

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Alright, listen up, ya bunch of idiot sandwiches! I'm here to tell ya all about Itapecuru-Mirim, and if you don't pay attention, you're missing out on a wild ride. Look, I've been callin' this damn town home for a while now, and lemme tell ya – it's a mixed bag of charm and madness. No, really, sit tight.

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