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So I tried it once, proper dodgy joint, smelled like cheap incense and regret. Bird’s hands on me, I’m thinkin’, “This is it, Ricky, you’ve peaked!” Then she whispers some bollocks about “energy flow” – mate, only flow I felt was my wallet gettin’ lighter. “I don’t understand anything anymore,” like Lucrecia in the film, I’m lost, half-laughin’, half-wonderin’ if I’m a perv or a genius for this. Cost me a ton, too – 80 quid for 30 minutes! Daylight robbery, but those hands? Bloody magic.

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Oh, and listen, I gotta mention some secret spots too – like the quirky little hideaway on Rua Barão de Limeira, where local artists scribble their souls on walls. Nuthin’ says “real BH” like a spontaneous burst of urban art. I once had a deep, deep conversation with an old painter there. He muttered, “The art's in every crack, every smile,” and that cracked open my inner zen.

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