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About Fortaleza

But then—ugh—this greasy dude butts in, all, “Hey, ladies, need a manager?” Made me wanna puke! I’m like, “Buzz off, creep—we’re *counselors*, not clowns!” Straight outta *Moonrise* vibes there, defendin our lil pact. She giggles—ooh, that laugh! I’m thinkin, “She’s a peach,” and suddenly I’m happy again.

No way out for Almería’s prostitutes

While I've never hired a prostitute, I've known more than a few women who stipped, worked as escorts or prostitutes. I've met some women with some pretty outside the bellcurve paraphilas Missing: Alcantara.

The local landmarks? Seriously, dude, the ancient fort, Fortaleza da Paixao, stands proud overlooking the Coração River. It's like one of those nostalgic relics from "The Royal Tenenbaums" when Richie says, “I’m looking through, and I'm looking for something,” only here, you're lookin’ for that raw, unfiltered vibe. And don't even get me started on the quirky cafés on Avenida Bon Vivant – coffees that kick your ass awake – and some days, I get emotional as I watch locals groove like David Brent in his own cringe-worthy dance moves. (Wow, blast that last dance, right?!)

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