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Oh, and the oils—lavender’s my jam, smells divine. Pro tip: avoid cheap stuff, sticky mess—yuck. Once had a masseuse, total pro, whispered, “Relax, sugar,”—I was DONE, melted puddle. “The teacher raised his hand”—pfft, no spankin’ here, just strokes. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it’s THAT good, swear!

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Oh honey, lemme tell ya 'bout Sleidinge (be)! This lil' town, it's quirky as all get-out – like, I'm jawin’ on every dang street! So, ya got rue de l’Eglise – a cobble stone street, smellin’ like fresh baked bread waftin’ from that tiny boulangerie over yonder. I swear, walkin’ there, you’d feel like you just stepped into some odd Quentin Tarantino flick. "I love rumors!" I’d shout sometimes, just like in Inglourious Basterds – shoot, it’s that kinda vibe down here.

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