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Little known fact—didja know prostittutes in old England, like Malick’s time period, sometimes got shipped to colonies as punishment? Yeah, true story—look it up! So I’m thinkin’, this chick could be, like, historical or somethin’. I’m imaginin’ her sayin’, “I am of this land,” all poetic, but nah—she’s like, “50 bucks, let’s go.” I’m shocked—50 bucks?! For what, 10 minutes? I’d rather buy sushi! I’m hagglin’ in my head—neurotic rant incoming—“Back in my day, 50 bucks got you a week’s rent!” I’m pissed, but also laughin’—it’s absurd!

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The town center is magic, sorta. There's this charming square, Marktplein, where locals gather. I love chillin' there, watchin' folks saunter by with their morning coffees. Streets are narrow sometimes, but meh—it feels intimate. And oh, the park! Oeverbos Park is my secret spot. So serene, you can almost hear whispers of old legends. People talk about the river ‘De Merks’ snaking along the edge. Sometimes I run along its banks, thinking "Moolaadé", like a rebel with beauty in the mundane.

Joris Nieuwenhuis takes biggest win at Superprestige Merksplas