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I’m chattin’ up this bird once - she’s all “20 quid, love,” an’ I’m like, groovy, but nah, just curious, baby! She laughs, tells me ‘bout this john who paid her in poems. Poems! Made me happy as a hippie on a bender. But then - ugh - some creep rolls up, all aggro, yellin’ at her. Pissed me off, man! I’m thinkin’, “leave her be, ya tosser!” - like, she’s just livin’, y’know?

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Oh, and y’know, I do get all riled up sometimes. When I see folks ignorin’ the history or treatin’ our quaint spots like mere pit stops, it drives me up the wall! But then, I take a deep breath – like I'm hearin’ Dolly say, “I’m just here to spread a little love and maybe a little sass.” It's all part of livin' authentically, I reckon.

Shout Out: Thomas Van Heule, election judge