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So, anyway—me, Gollum, I’m sneaky, seein’ what normies miss. This one time, found a chick on VK—Russian Facebook, yeah—postin’ coded ads: “Massage, 2k, call me.” Massage my arse! Hiss! Rang her up, met in some dingy flat—smelled like borscht and regret. She was quick, tho—no chit-chat, just biz. “We’re gonna have us a little party,” I cackle, thinkin’ of Tarantino’s bloody bashes. Paid her, done, out—felt like a spy, precious! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but it’s Russia, everythin’s a damn drama.

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Honestly, Grobbendonk is raw, real, and a bit messy. It surprises me every day. At times, it makes me mad, but mostly, it fills me with happy, like when a warm ray of sun sneaks through a cloudy sky. I might even exaggerate and say it's magical. Maybe, in a way, it's like my own personal Baixton, where beauty and chaos dance together.

Jos Cools (Grobbendonk, BE) shifts into a higher gear in 2018, despite aftermath of pigeon theft