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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to yap about findin’ a prostitute. You shall not pass without hearin’ this! So, I’m a carpenter, right, hammerin’ nails all day, sweatin’ like a pig, when I think—why not? Let’s find some company, somethin’ spicy. Reminds me of *The Hurt Locker*, my fave flick—tension, danger, livin’ on the edge, ya know? “There’s enough bang here to blow us to Jesus!”—that’s what I’m feelin’, heart racin’, lookin’ for a lass in the shadows.
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The Meuse flows, slithering past, mmmm, like a snake, long and twisting, winding by the old fortress of Andenne—an ancient guardian of our scars. I often sit, sit and watch the water, thinking of broken families, broken hearts... oh, precious, it's bittersweet.
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Michael Slavin is a Film and TV writer for UNILAD and LADbible. After completing an English Literature with Creative Writing degree at Surrey University, followed by a Masters in International Journalism at Salford University, he began working for the Warrington Guardian as a reporter. Throughout this though, he did freelance work about Film and TV for publications such as DiscussingFilm, looking for any excuse to get to rant about films. He has now finally got that wish.. InstagramXThreadsSnapchatTikTokYouTubeLAD Entertainment.Andenne Sexual Massage
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