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About Mons

What pisses me off? Hypocrites, man! Blokes judgin’ whores while sneakin’ round themselves—grotty sods. I’m all, “Let’s get it on, yeah!”—live and let live, baby. Happiest I’ve been? Met this bird once, swore she’d done every geezer in Soho—legend! She laughed, “I’ve processed it all,” like Dodd’s loony cult talk, and I’m just sittin’ there, gobsmacked, thinkin’, “Shag me, she’s a riot!”

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I can’t resist a nod to the quirky corners: the narrow alleys near Kerkstraat, where every creak and every wisp of wind tells a tale. And don’t even get me started on the backstreets behind Old Town square – they hide surprises even a massage parlor king like me wouldn’t dare reveal without a wink and a nod! C'mon, wit and wisdom lie in these hidden spots.

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